The Club Meeting (a.k.a. I‘ve Only Been Down to the Club)

Words and music by Joseph P. Skelly, 1876.

Last night I was out rather late.
Just on a bit of a spree.
My wife for my coming did wait
When asleep I thought she would be.

But I found her in passion and tears.
Says she, “It’s a sin and a shame.”
She scratched both my eyes and my ears,
And I thought I had better explain.

Oh the club had a meetin’ last night, *hic* love,
Of business we had a great sight, *hic* love.
Don’t think for a moment I’m tight, *hic* love,
I’ve only been down to the club.

My boots I left down in the hall,
And slowly I crept up the stairs.
I kept very close to the wall
For to reach my room unaware.

But before I got up to my door
Somehow I got lost in the dark.
I tripped and I fell on the floor.
This was all I could remark.

Oh the club had a meetin’ last night, *hic* love,
Of business we had a great sight, *hic* love.
Don’t think for a moment I’m tight, *hic* love,
I’ve only been down to the club.

She wept and she sobbed and she cried
Said she, “I’m going back to my ma.”
While I on the mantelpiece leaned,
A-trying to enjoy my cigar.

Says, let me alone for awhile,
And I’ll buy you a pretty new dress.
Then I saw her beginning to smile,
And I gave her a sweet little kiss.

Oh the club had a meetin’ last night, *hic* love,
Of business we had a great sight, *hic* love.
Don’t think for a moment I’m tight, *hic* love,
I’ve only been down to the club.

Collected from Victor 19813, as sung by Carl T. Sprague, recorded August 5, 1925.

Last night I was out rather late, just out on an innocent spree
My wife for my coming did wait, while sleeping I thought she would be.
I found her in passion and tears, while she cried, “It’s a sin and a shame.”
Well she scratched both my eyes and me ears, than I could only exclaim

Chorus
Well, the Club had a meeting last night—(hic) love
For business we had a great fight—(hic) love
Don’t think for a moment I’m tight—(hic) Mary Ann
I’ve only been down to the Club

My boots I left down in the hall, and slowly I crept up the stairs
I kept rather close to the wall, and tried to ascend unaware
But just as I got to the door, somehow I got lost in the dark
Well I stumbled and fell on the floor, then I could only exclaim

She cried and she screeched and she screamed, she said: “I’ll go home to my Ma.”
While I on the mantle piece leaned, and tried to enjoy my cigar.
I promised to buy her a dress if she’d leave me alone for awhile,
and then I gave her a sweet little kiss, then I saw her beginning to smile.

Collected from “The Roaming Cowboy”, Book No. 2, published by Radio Station XEPN, Piedras Negras, Coahuila, Mexico, n.d. (circa 1938).